When I look back to the initial aims of my project—a collection of 12 poems written following 4-5 shadowing experiences highlighting the humanity, strength, and empathy of female surgeons, I feel I exceeded my initial goals and expectations. The ultimate series is composed of 12 poems written aFer 12 separate shadowing experiences and interviews, each a poe/c portrait of its subject. Three of the poems have been accepted for publication by The MacGuffin, a literary journal out of Detroit, one was short-listed at the Wolverhampton Literary Festival in England, and multiple others are currently under review by literary journals across the country. Finding a home for this sort of work is difficult—walking the line between accessibility and language that is true to the poem’s central figure has been especially challenging. Some of the poems are opaquer than others. Some are in couplets (a traditionally narrative form) and others s/chic. Finding the right tone and form for each piece required reading broadly and constantly seeking new ways of framing familiar environments.

In interviewing twelve women surgeons about what gives them joy and sustains them in their work, what has changed in the field of surgery since they entered it, and how they arrived where they are, I’ve had the selfish dual pleasure of seeing the many paths my own career could take and acknowledging and honoring the unique strengths of each surgeon. I selected a metaphor that I felt central to the connections I witnessed and wove it through each poem, additionally using it as the title. Though I’ve struggled in the past with series that have to adhere to a predetermined formula, this structure gave me direction when I was having trouble synthesizing my impressions of a particular shadowing day or appointment. I have immense gratitude for the subjects of my poems who opened their opera/ng rooms, clinics, offices, and wards to my observation and readily answered oFen personal and intrusive questions. Their support for and openness to my project is what made it possible.

In terms of the end-product, I’m very proud of the poems to come out of the series. I’m happy to have placed several and will continue to hone the collection, with the intention of interleaving other poems I’ve written over the last several years to produce a book-length (or at the very least chapbook-length) manuscript. At this point, I have the volume to submit the collection but not the organization or manuscript, and so will continue working on these aspects over the course of the next several months.

In revisiting favorite poets and old influences as well as investigating new ones I have been able to reconnect with my love for poetry and enter a new generative phase, for which I am enormously grateful. Likewise, I have been able to connect with ar/s/c peers and share work which has been lovely. By writing a portrait for each surgeon, I was able to make a statement that I believe disrupts the dominant narrative of surgery—there is no one surgeon personality and certainly no one woman surgeon personality—each enters the field with their own passions and intentions and accrues their own accolades.

As I reflect on the process, I am especially grateful to Louise Aronson for reading through rough drafts and offering thoughts as well as for keeping me on track with the anticipated /meline. I’m grateful for the school’s openness to my unorthodox project and am so glad to have had this /me (and to continue to have this /me) to focus on poetry which I do truly view as my co-career. As I interviewed for residency I would always talk about this project—it truly has been a combination of my two passions: poetry and surgery, with an undercurrent of norm disruption and individual insight that I strive for in both realms of work.